Consecration Thoughts
The Road She Chose
When I started on this journey, I did not know the Holy Mother.
I was a drunk after work. Everyday.
Jesus said to me that He wanted me to meet his family.
I had a personal encounter with the Virgin Mary.
Some things changed instantly.
Other changes were on the way.
I began to pray the Rosary every day.
Two years later, I wanted to be rid of the drunkenness and self-centeredness.
To no avail, I was entrenched.
I was at its mercy.
Everything that I tried to do to change my path, I failed.
I prayed the Rosary every day.
Not long after this, The Blessed Virgin spoke to me twice.
Overwhelming to say the least.
Later, I admitted I was helpless against alcohol.
Admitting this was a hard hill to climb.
I prayed the Rosary every day.
Fast forward to 2017.
Massive heart attack.
A Widow maker on a golf course.
I was a walking miracle as told to me by the medical community.
30 days later, open-heart surgery and recovery.
Soon to be 100 % recovery.
I prayed the Rosary when I could.
Two weeks later, I experienced a very emotional complete life and spiritual reset.
I knew I was hers now.
Perhaps not exclusively.
But I was hers.
I prayed the Rosary every day.
At this point, I wanted to be consecrated to her more than anything.
It was my desire.
I was a non-Catholic.
I wanted my relationship to her to be permanent.
I prayed the Rosary every day.
She chose this road.
I have been with her since 2012, leading me through these life issues perfectly.
I never waivered from her and never drifted.
On March 25, 2019, I consecrated myself to her the first time.
I am hers.
Contrary to what others may believe, that is the best thing I have ever done for myself.
Contrary to what others may believe, this is the Experience of my Lifetime.
I was born in 1960.
I prayed the Rosary every day.
I became Catholic in 2019, along with my wife, and the Blessed Virgin is my patron saint.
I pray the Rosary to this very day.
My Motives
My main motive to my consecration was Mary herself. I had been through alcohol abuse, a widow maker heart attack, open-heart surgery, and recovery. After making it through all of that with her guidance and love, my deepest desire was to be closer to her and I wanted to be as close to her as she would allow me to be. Two weeks after my surgery was over, I experienced a solitary, very emotional and very spiritual, complete reset.
I completely realized who was in charge. I also realized who I wanted to care for me, to watch over me, to lead me, to be there when I need them, to love me. I shed a lot of tears.
Jesus was absolutely in charge of my life and all the events that had and were happening in it. He was responsible for all miracles that had occurred and everything the Blessed Mother had done he was in essence behind or completely in agreement with her in accomplishing. I had actually coded and died on a golf course. I would be completely healed before all was said and done.
My reset was also about my Blessed Mother, and very heavily so. I had a burning desire to be under her total care and as close to her as possible and that desire led me to my consecration. I wanted this more than anything else, even more than my health. I wanted to “belong” to her, and I did belong to her. When this whole reset was over, I was hers. Lock, stock, and barrel. My consecration was the next step, and I wanted my relationship to the Blessed Mother to be permanent.
My Fears and Apprehensions
I quickly found out that Consecration to Mary was not as easy as I thought it would be. A lot was going to be required of me just to be consecrated. I could not get over giving everything to her. The Montfort method, as I call it, required this. She shall be over all of my spiritual life and be entitled to all of my stuff (not that she needed it or wanted it). She shall use the spiritual gifts that I had accumulated for her purposes. All of my gifts; whatever they were and regardless of whether I knew they existed or how I had managed to acquire them.
I began to vacillate on whether I really needed to do this. “What am I getting myself into”, I would ask over and over again. I would in essence talk myself out of doing this. With the church itself and all that was going on it – the good and the bad, the clean and the filthy, I began to have second thoughts. Through all of the apprehensiveness, the burning desire remained. I wanted her to be everything that she was allowed to be for me. It was my decision now and I wrestled with it every day. But I never really made a cut and dry decision.
Help
I had to reach out for help. So I went to her in prayer as I always do when I need her and turned it all over to her. I let her take control and lead me where she desired me to go.
I said to her “You have been with me all of this time and you have brought me all this way through all of this turmoil. You have done nothing but keep my best interest in your heart and you have looked out for me and delivered me to this point virtually unscathed. Whatever you want is the way this is going to be. I am completely stepping aside. All is in your hands now. Whatever you decide, I will do.”
And I trusted her completely. This was very hard for me, but it was necessary for the growth of my faith, and it was just about all I could do. When I look back and analyze this situation, I believe I was maneuvered into this decision. I sincerely believe it was necessary to build trust in her. I also know this was the right choice.
And she delivered … once again. Just like every time I go to her for help, everything has worked out to perfection once again.
Mary's Road (From Locutions to the World)
Mary
The road to victory is not an easy road, filled with pleasures and delights. That is why many do not walk this road even though it brings great peace. Only faith reveals this road. So, I say to you, “Come, let us follow this path together”.
To those who come to me, I reveal my ways. They are so surprising and filled with my delights. I want so much to describe this way. Whoever walks my path is not alone. I am always with them. They have given themselves to me and I give myself to them.
This is the great prize. They know that I am always with them. Even when they fall, or wander off the path, I accompany them and bring them back.
They do not trust themselves or their own strength. No need for that. They trust me for everything. Even when they bring me what is little, I add my portion and it is enough.
They never worry about their weaknesses or their failures, or the many times they do not measure up. When they have done their best, they say, “Mary will supply the rest”.
I protect them (a thousand times a day). I console them, providing for their needs, and they constantly give thanks, knowing that, without me, they would fail. This is my road and all are invited to walk with me.
You Cannot Love someone you do not know.
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